I'm A Faliure By Design

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IN CASE YOU ARE SLOW
AND HAVENT ADDED MY NEW LJ
WHICH WAS LIKE A MONTH AGO
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NEW LJ

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ADD IT NOW
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TAKING BACK SUNDAY
"Bike Scene"

I'll leave the lights down low
so she knows I mean business
And maybe we could talk this over
Cause I could be your best bet
Let alone your worst ex
And let alone your worst...

I wanna hate you so bad
But I can't (but I can't) stop this
anymore than you can

So honestly, how could you say those things
when you know they don't mean anything
And you know very well
that I can't keep my hands to myself,
hands to myself

I wanna hate you so bad
But I can't (but I can't) stop this
anymore than you can

This is all wrong and it shows
There's certain things I promised not to let you know,
(I've got a silly way of keepin me up on the edge of my seat,
I've got a silly way of keepin me up on the...)
not to let you know
I never, never...

You've got this silly way
of keeping me on the edge of my seat
But you're only counting the clock against the train
And I'm miserable, oh
(I've got a silly way of keepin me up on the edge of my seat,
I've got a silly way of keepin me up on the...)
And you're just getting started
I'm miserable, oh

You've got me right where you want me
(let's never talk) Let's never talk, let's never,
let's never talk about this again because...
I didn't want it to mean that much to me
I didn't want it to mean that much to me
I didn't want it to mean that much to me
I didn't want it to mean that much to me

Anyway... yeah

its vday
and everyone is leaving to go to the hampsons
but im sick with a fever :.(
yeah today is destined for disater
this is what happens when i get bored

i must say im in love with http://www.purevolume.com/theacademyis

"My life reads like the classifieds.
Pages of what's for sale; whats on the auction block.
Attention bidders! Its line 45.
He's got a decent voice, he's got that crooked smile.
Hold on, you havent heard the best yet.
He writes good storylines, he's got those honest eyes.
So take him home for just $9.95.
He'll sing the songs you like, he'll keep you warm at night."


friday layed in the dark newly capreted hampson's basement with leslie amanda rich jay nate and scottie.
last night SBHAA + TGBC party at juji's house we wacthed aqua teen hunger force and made fun of myspacers and ate jujis food.
tonight i feel like blahhh but i want to see emily & tim .. oh yeah and jordan too lol, at brynnies house tonight. its a true SBHAA + TGBC party.

i lessthanthree my friends cause they are all ADHA or ADD or just normally werid like that <33
haha jk, but no seriously.

hmmm so today i was sitting at my comp liek normal
nate called and asked if i wanted to go to VW
so nate and tim showed up at my door 10 min later
we went to the ewwie vdubs didnt get anything
went to tim hortons/wendys .. saw katy there too
hmm had a snow ball fight in the parking lot
untill tim hit a car .. they were pissed
so we went to the hampsons
had more snow ball fights
....
and did a bunch of other stuff that i dont feel like typing anymore
sooooooo i love my friends
oh yeah friday show wasnt taht good and saturday ppl came over to my house
mmmm that's all

im in love with .. http://www.purevolume.com/theacademyis
just doo itt

by juji:

.

RELIENT K
"Jefferson Aero Plane"

If it hurts kiss it better
You wear skirts I write nice letters
Never said nothing with flowers
Though we always talked for hours
And it seems to get much colder when you cry on your own shoulder
And we know the show must go on
Guess I know I guess I'll throw on

[Chorus]
Some Jefferson airplane I'm trapped and I am enclosed
But I won't complain i'll open all the windows [x2]
Cause when it's colder I feel much better when I cry on my own shoulder
Just throw on a sweater and go

And I'll go to undergo a change of heart, a change of clothes
And when i'm home i think i'll go eat cereal and stare out the window


I'll make the calls you cover your ears
Niagra Falls still flows on New Year's
I will save your plunging neckline
Kiss your face, you try to deck mine
If I behave it's gonna cost him
Skip the rave in downtown Boston
And we know the show must go on
Guess I know I guess I'll throw on

[Chorus]

And I'll go to undergo a surgery to purge me of this lonely mood
And my ego, the status quo, provides me with a decent attitude
And i'll go to undergo a change of heart, a change of clothes
And when i'm home, i think i'll go eat cereal and stare out the window

Cause you confused me more than anyone
And adjustment has begun
To let me feel the desperate needto leave what we undid undone
And maybe you could sympathize
With the bags under my eyes
And we'll see the signs are saying that we have used up all our (tries)
Try to be a better person
To be a better friend
To be a better son
He tries to be a better someone
That understands the difference
And that he cant show all the people all the things that really mean as much as could (feel)
Feels like i dont remember
Ever being this tired (before)
Before now my eyes were closed to all of the beauty of this world

[Chorus]

And i'll go to undergo a surgery to purge me of this lonely mood
And my ego, the status quo, provides me with a decent attitude
And i'll go to undergo a change of heart, a change of clothes
And i'll go, oh yes
I'll go and hope the new me shows so everybody knows
That i've found myself able to fly away with out magic feathers or jefferson aero planes
I've got with me all that i need
.

im in love with my friends <33333
even though im envious of the couples
us 5 left over girls still have a blast
i love my friends soo much, they are so fun.

dear Lord, thank you so much for giving me caring friends who make me a better person.

<333333333333333333333

last person:
you touched - hugged emily
you talked to - emily
you hugged- emily
you instant messaged - emily
you yelled at - my mom
you called - my mom
called you - my mom

favourite:
color- red
album- uhhh prob TBS or MAE
shoes- my 90 dolla kangro leather addidas indoor soccer shoes
animal- dog
movie- ferris bullers day off
song- tisbury lane by mae orrrr since youve been gone by KC
vegetable- eww
fruit- water melon
cartoon- dislike cartoons

my father thinks i am: lazy, stubborn, not trying to reach my full potiential
my mother thinks i am: a slacker, stubborn, not mature [pshh whatever]
my siblings thinks i am: her little sister.. when i act more mature than her
my grandmother thinks i am: nice
my grandfather thinks i am: r.i.p. i love you grandpa, i hope your having fun up there!
my best friend thinks i am: uhh nice helpful.. uh idn?
my boyfriend/girlfriend thinks i am: INVISABLE.... cause i dont have a bf
three things you are often complimented for: uhhhhh pshh i dont know

personality = stuborn as he!!, i try to think postive doesnt work though, i like to get along with everyonee equaly
a compliment you got that made you blush = ppl or well boys telling me im pretty

you get embarrassed when =when i make an a$$ of my self , which happens often
makes you happy = my FRIENDS, GOD,boys
upsets you = school, BOYS, hypocrites
you keep a diary = LJ
you like to cook = only cookies, but i cant bake ginger bread cookies haha ;D
you have a secret you have not shared with anyone = sure
you fold your underwear = psh noo
you talk in your sleep = no
you set your watch a few minutes ahead = no, im always late, fashionable late of course
you bite your fingernails = gah when im stressed out [24-7] or watch a movie
you believe in love = "love is just a hoax, so forget what you have heard" -tsc


I KNOW: you're fake
I WANT: a boy
I HAVE: awesome friends
I WISH: a had a boy and it was summer
I HATE: school and boys
I MISS: you, and the summer
I FEAR: being alone. forever. spiders, school
I HEAR: that sbhaa is going to hotel erotica during spring break
I WONDER: how my life will turn out
I REGRET: that i didnt try harder to be with you, and i regret pushing myslef away from you
I LOVE: my friends and my God.
I ACHE: in my toe and sholders lol
I CARE: about my friends and if they are happy
I ALWAYS: give up too early
I AM NOT: p e r f e c t
I DANCE: all the time
I SING: when to sbh & tgbc .. duh
I DO NOT ALWAYS: say the right things
I FIGHT: for my right to partyyyy [old skool sry]
I WRITE: in my lj
I WIN: when you win
I LOSE: when you lose
I CONFUSE: myself over boys
I LISTEN: to my friends for advice
I CAN USUALLY BE FOUND: at the computer at a sbh or tgbc show or driving around with my friends
I AM HAPPY: when all the puzzle pieces are found and fit in place

i like sitting in a room and knowing everyone around you loves you and you love them

SBHAA <333 "my heart, my soul and my insides"
TGBC <333 uhh duhh, only the coolest kids ever

ladies night in are the best ex. when it's at juji's house
i loved the conversation cards and getting to know everyone better
i whish i could remember great qoutes from yesterday but all i can think of is "slurp slurp" lol

i miss the boys .. alot. idn why it's not like i'm attached to any of them, but i love my guy friends to death- even though they can be real a-holes and do stupid things, i still love them all.


i'm so happy midterms are over, i am surronded by wonderful people who care about each other, and the heart ache is over. Semester two IS the new year, we start over fresh. i'm ready for new adventures, new boys, new boys, did i say new boys? lol. yeah i'm going to date out side the circle of guy friends for a change ! wow whish me luck and if you find any charming commited guys let me know ;p

i'm happy, but i only feel content - there's just something, well someone, missing...

.
myspace has taken over the world
and me - im addicted i swear
anyways if any reads this any more
please do this>
id apreciate it
k, thanks

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you do me?
11. Would you kiss me?
12. Would you hug me?
13. Physically, what stands out?
14. Emotionally, what stands out?
15. Do you wish I was cooler?
16. On a scale of 1-10, how hot am I?
17. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
18. Am I loveable?
19. How long have you known me?
20. Describe me in one word.
21. What was your first impression?
22. Do you still think that way about me now?
23. What do you think my weakness is?
24. Do you think I'll get married?
25. What makes me happy?
26. What makes me sad?
27. What reminds you of me?
28. If you could give me anything what would it be?
29. How well do you know me?
30. When's the last time you saw me?
31. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
32. Do you think I could kill someone?
33. Do you think our friendship is getting stronger/weaker/or staying the same?
34. Do you feel that you could talk to me about anything and I would listen?
35. Are you going to put this on your LiveJournal and see what I say about you?

.
Underoath; Never Meant To Break Your Heart

tears run down my face just like the last
no different from yesterday
sick from the mirror
do these prayers feel sincere
the dirt never washes clear
you were good, so good
i grew to love your lies
until i put you in the past
love was lust until he revealed
the man behund the mask
will the scars go away
in this world i have no place
FORGIVE ME JESUS THIS TIME I CRY
i rip my heart outto give to you
alone it never did me any good
hold me close, wash my mind
destroy the me that lives inside
.

FRIENDS ONLY

cause some things - the world shouldnt know

like calendars dying
at new year's eve parties
as we kiss hard on the lips
and swear this year
will be better than the last

Ten seconds left until midnight
nine chances to drown ourselves in black hair dye
eight faces turned away from the shock
seven windows and
six of them were locked
five stories falling
forever and ever
three cheers to the mirror
now there are two of us
can we have one last dance?

excuse the last update
extreme depresso mode sorry

"If I could I would shrink myself
and sink through your skin to your blood cells
and remove whatever makes you hurt"

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!
thanks for everything you deserve this day and much more.

MERRY XMAS MY FRIENDS
ilove/hate/burn/miss kylee !
and i miss emily who i havent seen in 3 days